Thursday, March 15, 2012

Gone too soon

Losing a child due to a miscarriage is devastating no matter how early or late it happens.  For a woman, as soon as she finds out she is expecting, her whole being is devoted to this little miracle in her.  Lots of questions and feelings go through her mind when she loses the child.

Was it something I did, was something wrong, why did it happen?  But there are no answers, just grief.  It is a painful process to go through, grieving.  I lost a baby very early on 5 years ago this month.  I had a horrible time going through the process and I think I pushed the feelings out of the way and tried to go on as normal.  However, the grief and anguish came flooding back a year later in a college class I was in.  We had to paint a picture and explain it.  Without any planning, I drew something that represented the soul I lost. 

I broke down in class when I had to explain it and it was then that I realized I had not finished the grieving process.  I had another 2 babies and kept the feelings of the lost baby suppressed.  My husband and I never spoke about it again.  Then yesterday I was browsing Facebook and noticed a beautiful picture with a title Gone too soon.  It's dedicated to children lost to miscarriage.  I immediately felt drawn to it.  While such a sad topic, the colors were anything but sad.  I mentioned it to my husband and he was surprised I still thought about the baby we lost. 

Gone too soon - Beyond Words Designs    



He confessed he had put it out of his mind because it was so sad.  He held me while we talked and he thought it was a great idea to get something that would represent the lost baby.  The next day I immediately purchased this print from http://www.storenvy.com/products/285219-gone-too-soon-8x10-print?fb_ref=storefront-product-page&fb_source=home_multiline. 

We're going to put it up in the bedroom with the pictures of our other children to remind us of the one we lost.  Bittersweet knowing that the child is with our Lord in Heaven but we will one day meet him/her.  I like to think that they are looking down on us, praying and protecting us. 


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